When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Man, jail baloney is awful.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize