What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Randomize
