apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I think I just sharted jello shots
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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