That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
