my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
