I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
