i'm signing you up for texting rehab
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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