The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
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