I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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