But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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