Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize