The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize