i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
