By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
