Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
