Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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