some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
