she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize