Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I'm passing your future prison.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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