yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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