Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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