he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
