we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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