can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
