Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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