Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
