Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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