the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Randomize
