im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize