There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
