I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Randomize