how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
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