she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Randomize
