Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
