would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
