It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
