Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize
