If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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