too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I think i got beer on your cat.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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