mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
