Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize
