Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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