NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
