Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
