dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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