She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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