Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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