just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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