Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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