Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
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